BRENDA SERRANO

I can’t help but think what others thought about us, about me, about the box. We reached the border of El Paso and Juarez. Here it was, the start of this adventure. I had entered Juarez before by walking through the bridge from El Paso. But this time it was different. 

I felt droplets of sweat scurrying down my face onto my neck. It was warm and the sun was making its grand entrance at 7 am in El Paso. My anxiety was at an all-time high, but what else is new? Well, it turns out a lot. This anxiety was due to a one-and-only adventure. It was all new.

I entered Juarez to start my riding journey. The end destination? No idea. The first challenge was getting my 75-pound packaged bike, and other gear onto my flight: flights, taxis, and busses, more accurately said. I was very grateful and appreciative I had my dear friend, Alyssa, assisting me, as we pushed, carried, and struggled to move my bike through the walking bridge of Paso Del Norte. This was only the start. 

Entering the second week of my stay in Mexico, I reached Puebla. It had been over a decade since I had visited. Revisiting this beautiful city from an adult perspective was a whole new experience. Little Brenda did, however, have fluttering hidden memories resurfacing. For example, the mole in Puebla was still the absolute best, and the Zocalo had the same lively energy of la gente scurrying and moving around. It was all so charming, but I had arrived in Puebla, to visit a special someone.

My father grew up in a town about an hour outside of the city of Puebla. This town is called Tecamachalco, a simple town with more corn crops than homes, and off into the distance Volcán Citlaltépetl stands at the center of attention. I had made it here to visit my grandmother. Her home is just as I remember. The couches remained in the same position they had been when I was 10, her kitchen had the same smell, the smell of tortillas and an aroma of coffee. 

There was a feeling, a feeling I couldn’t shake off. Melancholy was deep in the air, it surrounded me and the entirety of the house. So many beautiful memories, yet, grief cut through intensely. With the recent passing of my uncle, and the aging of my grandmother. The house once joyful and chaotic, remained still.